The joys of winter air travel

As I sat in the plane this morning, watching people board, I took a moment to think back over the last couple of hours. Snow had brought most airport to a stand-still the day before, and a horde of unhappy, tired and frustrated customers where trying to make their way to their Christmas holiday destinations. So, even though I was ready for it, I had a bit of a shock as I walked into Bristol's terminal.. 

It has been a real long time since I last had to queue to check my luggage in. And I mean really queue; not the 10 minutes wait we are now used to. No, I am talking about the 2 hours long wait which ends by your flight number and destination being called so that you may now jump to the front and make it to the plane on time. At first I was troubled by the caos and lenght of the line I was in, but then I remembered. I remembered a time before paperless tickets, online check in - via your home pc, laptop or even mobile phone. Before hand luggage turned into actual suitcases and flying was more an adventure than just another mean of transportation. But now, we treat it like we do train journeys. We expect it to be on time, well organised, with a seat for each of us and a smooth journey ahead.

As I stood in my "Easy-Jet" queue, I noticed just how much, when things go wrong in the well oiled machine that is an airport and the rules we are imposed aren't followed by everyone, our animal instinct resurface ... First, I watched, in dismay, a man, followed by his two teenage boys and shy little wife jump the queue. Casually, as they were walking around, he asked one of the gentlemen slightly ahead of myself if this was the line for easy-jet. As his interlocuteur nodded, he gave a very quick look around and called his kids and wife to join him. Nobody moved nor said a thing. But I know every one felt it. You could see it in their body language. Funnily enought, I straight away started to feel my blood boil, anger coming over me and that very nerve getting agitated. I felt this was very childish behaviour and decided to push it away... Where did it go, I hear you ask... well, let see, shall we.

Then I struck a conversation with the woman behind me who was very protective of her own little space. But, as she was not only aware of it, but also rather candid about it, we had a nice discussion about social behaviour in such situations. Have you noticed how, when in a queue, most people cannot stand it if you are not moving straight away when the people in front of you move foward. Which is silly really, as it is only maybe a meter or 2, and yet we all struggle to keep our cool when in such position. So, after pointing this out to my new friend, and for the fun of a social experiment, I stopped and waited to see what would happen. Fair enought, the people in front of me started to build a nice gap between me and them and I started to get a few looks. That's when my brand new buddy nuddged me and, with a gentle laugh, said: "Come on, go, I can't stand it."

Eventually, as I was practically at the front of the queue, the airport voice called my flight number and everyone behind me rushed past to get to the desks. So, after recovering a little from my shell shock reaction, I suddently found myself torn between two check in desks: on my left, a family of 7 people - big and small - was trying to check in, while on my right, a group of 4 women were gathering their "small" hand luggage on the floor between themselves - reminding me a little of that same behaviour previously witnessed in clubs - as they checked in. And that's when I had an epiphany.

There needs to be zones assigned for different types of travelers. 

A. One for the families - after all, and I know this is anything but politically correct, but why should I suffer the constant moaning and complaining of little and medium people when I'm on holiday! It just puts a down on my holiday spirit.

B. One for groups - any more than 2 people! Because they're just too loud, chatty and happy for me.

C. One for couples - and lets put them all in one same terminal far away from the rest of us. I mean, what single person wants to queue behind a couple constantly smooching one another. Seriously, aren't they aware there are a large amount of frustrated single females walking around the place. No, they are not!!!

D. Last but not least, and the most important of all: one for people traveling by themselves. They are organised, quiet, and quick when going through security!!!

Talking about being quick, you would think that, by now, people would know the rules of going through security. And even if you don't know, you're told about it 20 times before you even get to the gate via your check in agent, internet website, oh, and big fat signs as you approach the conveyor belt that you are only allowed one hand luggage... ONE!!! NOT a mini suitcase and a hand bag!!! ONE!!! Because then, you have to reorganised all your stuff and when you do, it gets on MY nerve!!! It also reminds you that you need to take off your coat, belt and boots, take your laptop out of its bag, and remove anything from your pockets. So, could someone explain to me, why, oh why, do people wait until the very last second to get all that ready??? It's holding me back and getting on that nerve of mine again. And don't even get me started on liquids and see through bags!!!

Eventually, I get to the boarding gate and joined another queue, and may I just say, with all due respect, by God are the british good at this!!! The lady checking my papers then follows me to the boarding queue and asks passangers to use the entire room. Because, yes, you guessed it, they are very carefully lined up 2 by 2 with large amount of room on each side. And then, the nerve took over. There was noting I could do no more. So, with the blessing of the airport staff, I quickly, swiftly and feeling totally no shame at all, jumped the whole queue!!! I was within the first 20 people to get into the plane. TAKE THAT rules, regulations and social expectations!

As I settled into my seat, in the middle of the plane, right by the exit door, which has the largest leg room of the entire plane, I noticed the family that had jumped the queue way back when I was patiently waiting to check in, coming into the aricraft. RESULT, I say!!! I admit, this trip brought out the slightly evil, conniving, devious and cheeky side of me... But this is war, survival of the fittest. Or some might say, just the joys of winter air travel.

To be a good friend...

I’ve been in South Devon for over two years now, and I am slowly building a brand spanking new group of friends. I’m 37 and it is quite hard work to put together a new social circle. And I mean real friends. The type of people who will take you no matter the mood you’re in, who will forgive your outbursts, your hormonal imbalance and your untidy home. All right, all right, I’m just talking about me, here. Still, I’m talking about the ones that you can call in tears because you broke a nail. Because they know that nail is only the tip of the iceberg and they will listen to whatever nonsense you go on about.

The thing is, past the age of 10, making friends isn’t easy. I mean, have you recently tried walking up to someone, anyone, male or female and say: “Hey, do you want to play?” … No? You should try it sometime. See what happens… Ok, so, that might not be the appropriate phrasing. Let’s try “Hey, do you want to be my friend?” … Mmmm … No, you don’t think that would work either. It does sound a little bit freaky. What if I suggested “Can I buy you a beer?” Then, the person you’re talking to will straight away wonder what your agenda is. Because that’s how society has changed us. Apparently, we forgot how to be kind, honest, gentle and loving toward one another, especially strangers. We tend to automatically think the worse of people.

I have recently found myself falling in love with a gorgeous golden Labrador. Her owners let me take her out whenever I want to. So, I have discovered a totally different universe. For some reason, when I’m out walking with the dog, people are open, friendly and will happily have a chat as we cross path. It’s like, having that dog with me, suddenly makes me more appealing and less threatening. Do the same walk without the dog, and the people I cross path with will barely look up to say hello. People don’t trust easily, nor do they open up. And I believe that, the society we live in, isn’t helping either.

My point is, when it comes to relationships – friendship or other -  until you really get to know people and build a strong bond of trust, you have no idea what their lives are like, what they have been through up until you met, or even what they are going through right now. Over the last few weeks, I have learned more about some of my “new” friends, and I have realised how easy it is to forget that, behind their everyday faces, their routine and good looking life, their private lives could be falling apart, they might be going through some terrible tragedy or dilemma and no one on the outside would be none the wiser.

But when you know, when you find out, how you react to it defines who you are. It is so easy to pass judgment on someone, on a situation, or even on how your friend is managing it. And it is understandable too. You look at it from your own point of view, using your own experiences and feelings regarding the said situation. So, yes, it is understandable. But is it helpful? Is it kind? Is it loving? A few years ago, I would have said so. Today, I am not sure anymore. I look at the people around me and I can’t help but think that we have become too self centred even in our approach to helping one another.

So, as hard as it might be, I try to put my own prejudgment aside and listen more to my friends needs. And, even if sometimes I still can’t help but jump in with both feet to tell them what I would do if I was in their shoes, I find that, taking a step back to try and understand how they are feeling rather than why they are feeling this way, and empathise with that feeling, brings them more comfort than anything else I could rumble about.

So, as I try to be a good friend, I keep my mind, my soul and my heart open, try to keep my babbling tongue in check and thank God – or whoever is in charge – for the friends I have in my life who are doing just the same for me.